Tuesday, June 25, 2013


Dear Mike Patrick,  I think you are a condescending tool.  I care about your commentary on my team and our fans about as much as I care about your thoughts on Brittany Spears.  By the way, our name is Mississippi State, not Mississippi.

Dear Sammy,  Mama loves you bunches but it ticks me off when you pull out most of your stitches on the way home from surgery.  Also, happy 6 months adoption day!  Parts of it have been amazing and parts have knocked on the door of miserable.  We are a work in progress, and I have no regrets.

Dear MSU baseball team, I love you.  Even though you didn't do so well against UCLA, I just think you are fabulous.  You have character and class, and I'm so proud of you.  I also love the beards and wild hair. 

Dear John Hinton,  You are rapidly becoming a pathological liar.  The "wind" did not cake mud in your brother's eyes, nose, ears, and mouth.  Stop it.  That makes mama sad and pisses your brother off too.

Dear CWS,  I blame you.  I forgot to rinse the shampoo out of Sammy's hair tonight and didn't realize it until I was putting him to bed (early) and my kisses tasted like soap. I'm poorer, more tired and my children have suffered because of you.  I hope to see you again next year. 

Dear UCLA, Congratulations.  You deserve it.



Monday, June 17, 2013

no shoes and cat pee

You know how some days you stop and wonder how you got to this point in your life?  Where did you go wrong?  This isn't how you pictured it. 

Here is a recap of my moment from a couple of weeks ago.

7:40 AM-I absent mindedly put my kids in the car without grabbing their shoes. They went to the sitter's without shoes.  Not the end of the world, except they had hair cut appointments that day.  I still decided against turning around when I realized it a couple of miles from home.

3:20 PM-J.R. picks them up for hair cut appointments, and John Hinton promptly pulls a crown off one of molars with a sticky sucker from the sitters.

3:40-J.R. rushes him to the dentist-without shoes.  Now, at the hair cut place, I figured we were assuming the risk of no shoes.  But at the dentist, I feel like we were dragging the place down with respect to hygiene.  Whatever, both my kids were barefoot at the dentist. 

3:45-So, I run to the dentist to get Sammy so he can get his haircut, and he won't be permanently scarred from anything that may or may not be happening at the dentist. 

3:55-Sam and I head to the hair cut place, where he acts a fool while I get my hair highlighted then had a giant dirty diaper which I have to change on the floor of the bathroom. 

4:25-Then J.R. and John Hinton show still missing the crown.  Whatever.  My children continue to act like banshees until I banish them with their father until I'm finished. 

5:30-I finish and get in my car.  I notice a persistent stench that has been there a couple of days. 

5:40-I got home. I have J.R. come out to smell my car.  He nonchalantly deems it cat pee. I refute. I (in front of a group of party goers at my neighbors) proceed to get on my hands and knees with my butt in the air to smell every inch of my car to find the stench.  Shut. The. Front. Door.  A cat has peed on the floor mat. 

6:00-I pull the mat out and take it around front to wash it where I find both my boys butt-a-naked in front of all the neighbors.  They are playing the water hose. 

What the hell just happened?

The worst part is that they are my dang cats!!!  I rescued both of them.

We are super classy with a k. klassy.